InsaneJournal

Ron's Declaration - R/Hr - PG-13
Author: shocfix
My challenge : 49. Harry gives Ron a few pointers on how to please girls (ie, Hermione!).
Title: Ron's Declaration
Summary: Ron and Harry attempt to talk about girls
Words: 1370
Rating: PG-13 for language

Written for the first ever wave of the rwhgfqf - how come a canon relationship hasn't had a fqf before?

Uh, I promise that Hermione does make an appearance!

Betaed by the wonderful rosina_alcona and magicofisis, even though Ron/Hermione wasn’t in their original job description!


Ron's Declaration
****
While Hermione slipped back into the school to look through Dumbledore's private collection for any mention of Rowena Ravenclaw's jewellery, Harry and Ron slipped back into the Three Broomsticks for a few drinks.

"So, you haven't…" Harry gestured vaguely.

"No, leave it, Harry," Ron interrupted.

"You still haven't…"

"Harry!"

"You really haven't…"

"Harry, what part of, 'leave it the fuck alone' don't you understand?" Ron looked daggers at his best friend.

"Well, it's been over six months, and you still haven't…" Harry trailed off, frowning.

"Haven't what?" Ron asked, smirking.

"I, uh, dunno," Harry admitted, sheepishly. "You always deny it, before I ask for details."

Ron sniggered.

Harry blinked. "You've kissed her?" he hazarded.

"As a friend," Ron said, casually, digging his thumbnail into the cracks in the old, wooden table. "On the cheek."

"But, you're, um, together?"

"I don't know," Ron muttered.

"What?" Harry gasped. "After everything that happened last year? All the you-making-her-jealous-with-Lavender and all the her-making-you-jealous-with-McClaggen, and nothing has happened?"

Ron rolled his eyes and sighed, ostentatiously. "Harry," he said. "We have been with you almost every moment for the past six months. When do you think we have had time for this mad, passionate affair?"

Harry looked uncomfortable.

"Ugh," Ron grunted. "We are not blaming you, we are just, um, on-hold."

"But you've been 'on-hold' for about three years now, Ron," Harry said solemnly.

Ron snorted. "It's not that easy, OK?"

"What's not?"

"Talking to her," Ron muttered.

"About what?"

"Harry! Talking to her about, uh, relationship stuff."

"But what is there to say, after all this time? You're never short of words with Hermione!"

"That's arguing with Hermione, or planning with Hermione, or taking care of you with Hermione."

Harry glared at him.

"I just don't know what things to say to girls."

"But what about…"

"Don't say it," Ron interrupted.

"What about Lavender?" Harry insisted. "You did OK there."

Ron flushed and spluttered for a while, while Harry watched him with a raised eyebrow.

"OK, I never said anything to Lavender! Happy? I certainly never asked her to be my girlfriend! I just went up to the Common Room, seething about Hermione, and there she was and she was right in my face and I kissed her. And then she was just there all the time, climbing into my lap whenever I sat down, holding my hand, sitting beside me. It really was worse than the Giant Squid."

"You never told me about you and the Giant Squid," Harry said, with a pitiful attempt at a straight face.

"Oh, very funny!" Ron snapped. "Look, Lavender was one huge, pathetic mistake. Because I am pathetic and let my sodding sister get under my skin about never having been kissed. And now I just don't know how to ask her!"

"Then don't," Harry suggested.

"But I thought that's what you wanted me to do?" Ron looked truly pathetic.

Harry groaned. "Look, maybe you don't have to actually say anything. And I just want you both to be happy, to be together, I've been waiting years for it to happen."

"Really?" Ron's ears flushed.

"Of course, really! Look, with Ginny…"

"I don't want to know!" Ron interrupted.

Harry glared at him. "I won't go into gory detail."

Ron put his hands over his ears. "I'm not listening!"

Harry took hold of his wrists and pulled his hands down to the table between them. "With Ginny," he insisted, "I didn't actually say anything, either."

"Really?" Ron looked confused.

"Well, you saw me! You saw me kiss her!"

"And that was it?" Ron spluttered.

"What? That was one hell of a kiss!" Harry looked offended.

"You were out that portrait hole like a rat up an aquaduct! I thought you were doing the right thing."

"But I did do the right thing, Ron. I looked for you as soon as I'd kissed her…"

"Yeah," Ron smiled. "But no! You really didn't talk to her about it? Ask her to be your girlfriend?" Ron frowned.

"Uh, no?"

"Harry! This is my sister we're talking about!"

"What? It just wasn't necessary, OK? I'd spent the best part of a year thinking about her, punching my pillow instead of Dean and worrying that you'd hate me for making a move on her!"

"Me? Really?" Ron looked touched.

"Really. Git."

They looked at each other.

"But," Harry said slowly, "when it happened, we didn't need to say anything else. We understood each other. That is why we were so happy together, and that is why she understands that it is over," he finished glumly.

"That's what you think," Ron scoffed.

"What?" Harry asked.

"Well, she's stayed at school because she is underage, hasn't she? Who d'you think she'll Apparate to as soon as she passes her test?"

Harry looked confused. "But she took it really well, when I said we couldn't be together…"

"Well, yeah, because at the moment she'd be the weak link, wouldn't she? She wouldn't want to put us in any more danger."

"The sneaky little…"

"Still my sister, mate!" Ron sniggered. "And so much for your legendary way with women, too!"

"No," Harry said firmly. "My legendary way with women still stands. OK, so neither of us managed to dump our girlfriends last year, but I am still way ahead of you on the landing them thing."

"So, your advice is just to grab Hermione and kiss her?"

"Yes. No. I don't know."

Ron frowned. "Really helpful. What would I do if my best friend didn't have a legendary way with women?"

"Well, it's because it's Hermione that it's complicated, right?" Ron didn't notice Harry's eyes flicking up to the doorway behind him.

"Harry! Of course Hermione is complicated. That is why I am still celibate!"

Harry winced and gave him a very pointed look. "You are also still celibate because the three of us sleep in one room!"

Ron waved that away. "Right, yes, I knew that. But I am really going to have to do something if I want snogging rights, and the longer it takes the more I don't know what to say!"

"More than the completely not knowing that you started off at?" Harry grinned.

"Yes," said a very grumpy Ron.

"But it's not just snogging rights, is it?" Harry asked casually.

"No, of course not! I've had snogging rights, and it isn't what it's cracked up to be."

"Well, what do you want?" Harry asked.

"Her. All of her. For ever. All sorts of soppy, stupid, girly, romantic stuff like babies and growing old together. 'Cos it can't be just snogging practise anymore, can it? Not with Hermione. I love her, Harry," he finished defiantly.

"Well, why didn't you say something?" Hermione said, briskly, sitting beside him.

Ron goggled at her. And at Harry. He looked backwards and forwards between them, growing redder and redder, opening and closing his mouth, but no sound came out.

"You fucking bastard," he finally gasped.

"Oh, that's romantic," Hermione tutted.

"Harry! You knew she was there!" Ron glared furiously at his friend.

"I think you may be completely missing the point and your chance, mate," Harry said wryly.

"What?" Ron snapped.

Hermione raised an eyebrow, almost audibly.

"Oh," Ron muttered. "Oh! Hermione! I um, I…."

"Did you mean it, Ron?" she asked as he stuttered to a halt once more.

"Yes," he gulped.

She smiled beatifically at him. "Well, it certainly took you long enough, didn't it?"

Ron mumbled something incoherent.

"So, can I assume that that was your declaration? That we are together now?" she asked him.

Ron nodded frantically, obviously not trusting his vocabulary. "Please," he added, politely.

Hermione chuckled, leant closer and kissed him softly. "Well, I can see that that is the best I am going to get, so I accept."

Ron grinned down at her. "Really?" he asked dopily.

"Really," she replied. "I love you too, Ron."

Harry smiled fondly at both of them, until she turned to face him and said briskly, "Right, well, you'll have to sleep in the middle in future, Harry. Now about Ravenclaw's jewellery…"