shocfix (![[info]](http://www.insanejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} shocfix) wrote,@ 2003-02-09 01:00:00 |
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| Entry tags: | 2007, 2007:ron/hermione, ron/hermione |
Biocolonisation - R/Hr - PG
Title : Biocolonisation
Author : shocfix
For : hildigunnur
Pairing : Ron/Hermione
Prompt : the no-knickers rule
Rating : PG
Words : 239
Biocolonisation
****
“Well, I think it shows just how little I mean to you,” Hermione said, chopping carrots viciously and making Ron wince and cross his legs.
“It has nothing to do with you…”
“Oh, well, that’s lovely,” she interrupted.
“A bloke is entitled to wank in the shower, Hermione.”
“Not a bloke who is supposed to be trying to get his wife pregnant.”
“This has nothing to do with the pregnant stuff,” Ron protested. “I just fancied a wank.”
“And your seed was supposed to reach me through biocolonisation, I suppose?”
“No, of course not… what?” Ron frowned at her. “What the hell are you on about, now?”
“I’d better go around with no knickers on, from now on,” Hermione muttered, chopping fiercely. “And hopefully some migratory bird will transport your seed for you.”
“Hermione,” Ron said carefully, carefully removing the knife and the pulped carrots from her hands. “I love you desperately, but you have totally lost the plot, love.”
“I’m your wife,” she said seriously.
“I know that.”
“I shouldn’t have to… to… walk into the bathroom and find my future children swirling down the drain in the shower!” She sniffed loudly and pitifully.
“I know, sweetheart,” Ron said, pulling her into a deep and careful hug. “I didn’t realise it would upset you this much.” He rolled his eyes, safely, above her bowed head. “And you’ll have first call on my bits from now on, I promise.”
****
I apologise for losing the plot, here – Hermione clearly isn’t Surtsey, and Ron will be able to colonise her just fine, without the involvement of any migratory birds. It’s just the effect that hildigunnur has on me.
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