C is for Can't - H/G - G
Title: C is for Can’t
Author: shocfix
Pairing: Harry/Ginny
Rating: G

For r_becca’s Alphabet Challenge.

You did say up to 700 words, so it is seven 100 word drabbles, one for each school year.


C is for Can’t
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The population of Diagon Alley had recognised him, and that had been strange, but when Ginny Weasley asks her mother if she could go and look at him – like he was a circus freak – well, that had taken the biscuit.

He has been so looking forward to meeting other Wizarding children, to finally fitting in, but now it seems he is as much of a freak here as in his old life.

But, though he knows she was running after her brothers, he can’t get the image of her chasing after the train out of his mind. He just can’t.

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Harry has never had anyone of his own, anyone who cared about him.

But now he has Ron, and, by extension, the whole of Ron’s family. It is even kind of nice that Ron’s little sister has a crush on him.

When Ron’s little sister is in danger, he doesn’t think twice and here he is, age twelve, sword in hand, fighting a dragon, and rescuing the fair maiden.

And Ron only makes one joke about it before seeing the look on Harry’s face and changing the subject, because he can’t be teased about the Chamber yet. He just can’t.

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He is incredibly dense in third year. When he comes round after the Dementors searched the train, when he is shaking and remembering terrible things, he should realise that Ginny is remembering the Chamber.

She came to find them in the dark and now she is crying.

Hermione is the only one to comfort her, and he feels a twinge of guilt, but Ginny is even shyer around him and he has no idea how to talk to her about it.

Even though he was the only other one there, even though he really thinks he should. He just can’t.

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How does he ever pluck up the courage to ask Cho to the ball?

But now he knows what it feels like to come so close to going with the girl he is crushing on, so he really should be more sympathetic when Ron cheerfully announces that he can take Ginny to the ball.

He winces as she stops laughing and admits she is already going with Neville. Knowing that she is torn between wishing she had said “No” and wishing Ron wasn’t such an insensitive git.

He really should have taken her to the ball, but now he can’t.

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Ginny is amazing in his fifth year. The only person to shout at him when he acts like an idiot; an inspiration in the DA; look at the way she gets him into Umbridge’s office to speak to Sirius.

And how has he repaid her friendship? He drags her all the way to London on an invisible horse, nearly gets her and her brother killed, flings her around the Ministry on a broken ankle.

There is absolutely no way he’ll let her get involved next time, he promises himself. No way he’ll endanger the Weasleys’ only daughter. He just can’t.

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In sixth year he admits to himself that he is crazy about her. That she brings the only splash of colour into his dark and drab world.

That her creamy freckled skin and vibrant red hair light up the common room and he can’t keep his eyes off her. Which is odd, because exactly the same hair and freckles on Ron do nothing for him.

Ginny is by his side, once again, when Death Eaters attack the school, and she is fierce and beautiful.

But anyone he loves just dies, and he cannot get close to her. He just can’t.

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So eventually Ginny just has to take matters into her own hands. She waits until after Harry has faced and defeated Voldemort; she waits until the aftermath of the battle has been cleared away.

She waits until Ron has been declared out of danger and Harry has returned to the common room looking pale and tired and grubby.

She touches his face and whispers his name and climbs into his lap and kisses him and his hands tangle in her sooty hair and he cannot believe that she is finally his. He just can’t.

But then he kisses her back.
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